Bringing home the hardware from Bible camp

The final day of Vacation Bible School (VBS) brought home a welcome surprise.

Last week three of our kids attended VBS at our local parish.

It was a bitter sweet week for our oldest. This is the last year she falls within the age limits. She is eager to graduate to be a helper next year. I'm proud of her; she generally shies away from these types of ways to serve. So that will be a big step for her and building confidence.

When I got home from work each day, the kids were excited to show me their daily cache of artwork, crafts, saint cards and other goodies.

On the final day, I didn't have time to ask how their last day was. Our 4 year old, who was proud to be old enough to attend this year, excitedly showed me a trophy as soon as I walked through the door.

Before I proceed, let me share a bit about our four year old. She is super cute. She can be a great helper, sweet as honey showering us with, "I love you." She loves to snuggle. But there is a darker side. We sometimes describe her as a volcano—beautiful to look at while she's dormant, but a threat to everyone around her when she's erupting, which could be at any moment.

I know what you're thinking, "All pre-schoolers are a little emotional and unpredictable." True, but she is the Mt. Vesuvius of children. I'm not talking a beautiful Hawaiian volcano. No, she's unpredictable mass destruction with adorable blonde curls.

Waking up in the morning can either be happy and cheerful, or she's more ornery than the most sever caffeine addict before her morning fix.

Mealtimes can be pleasant, or she can cry and whine for hours because she has the wrong cup-plate-bowl colour combination, or you gave her exactly the food she requested, or her milk is too white. OK, I made that last one up, but it's not an exaggerated example; it could happen.

Bedtime can be sweet and calm and prayerful, or she can erupt because, well, at this point there doesn't need to be a reason. It's the end of the day, and she's just done. Not that there's ever a real reason for an eruption.

Ah yes, the trophy. During the week, kids were able to earn "reward points" for doing good things, being a good listener or helper, etc. Positive reinforcement 101. Our four year-old got the trophy for being the best listener/helper throughout the week!

I'm not sure if I should be proud that we raised her to be so good or feel like an incredible failure for not seeing that type of cooperation at home more often. Heck, I'm having a good day—incredibly proud it is!

The circus that is mealtime with toddlers

Meals with kids are, well, let's say interesting. Maybe the whole three ring circus that is mealtime with young children will be another post for another time. For now, let's see what's in ring number one: getting toddlers to eat.

Menu selection should be fairly straight forward. The good ol' Canada's Food Guide (I'm sure there's an equivalent in your region or country) offers many options to have a well-balanced diet from the four major food groups. But we all know it doesn't work that way. Kids can get finicky, so we usually stick to our precious little ones' favourites. Of course, as soon as you cook their favourite, they don't like it.

I love those magazines that have "16 fun ways to make your kids eat" articles. They are one way to make parents regurgitate their meal. Sorry, I didn't go to culinary arts school. I don't have a team of assistant chefs spending hours prepping things. And I'm not a graphic designer who can photo edit the already near-perfect creations. OK, my wife is a graphic designer, so maybe that doesn't fit. But you get the point.

Just for argument's sake, let's assume I did have the time and skill. They are usually fun little animals or bugs we can create with our food. Seriously? Toddlers play with animals and more often than not scream "BUG!" if one comes close to them. Not the best choice.

Instead of engaging in the battle of wills (all the time), we've relaxed our theory of eating a fair bit with each subsequent child (we have four if you're keeping score). We have somewhat of a hybrid approach to getting our toddler to eat. It's a combination of realizing they will get a balance diet over time, maybe just not all in the same sitting like we do and should as adults; they really will eat when they are hungry enough; bribing them does work in the short term, and I do realize we're probably leading to therapy-worthy issues in the future; and we're OK with doing absolutely bizarre things to get the toddler to eat.

Our list of bizarre behaviour includes:

• The classic airplane. A current favourite with our 2 year old.
• Trains. Thank you Thomas the Tank Engine for offering a wide variety of characters to go through the tunnel. Variety is the spice of life.
• Cars, especially Lightning McQueen and 'Mater.
• Strawberry jam. When our son was young he would not eat his cereal without strawberries. When they weren't in season we tried strawberry jam. It worked. Mostly.
• Faking them out - option 1. "Look, daddy will eat some," and then pretend to eat a spoonful. Really sell it with an emphatic "Mmmm!"
• Faking them out - option 2. When  you know they want something else at the table, pretend to put in their bowl and mix it in. Unfortunately, you get away with this only once, maybe twice. Their taste buds can tell they've been duped.
• Peer pressure. Get the older ones to say they like it. Of course, that one can back fire when the older ones complain they don't like something. All of a sudden no one likes it, even if it's usually a favourite or the younger ones haven't even tasted it yet.
• Reverse psychology. "You don't like chicken do you?"
• And perhaps the most bizarre, and a hit for two kids in a row, having the food talk to the toddler. That's right. Talking food gets eaten. I don't know why it works, but my wife is some sort of culinary ventriloquist. First, the food needs to get the toddler's attention, "Um, excuse me. I want to see your teeth. Can I come visit your teeth?" Like she's under some sort of hypnotic spell, the toddler opens her mouth ready to oblige the food's request. The food lets out a little "ouch" with the first chew, and for some reason this doesn't horrify the toddler; it excites her. Should I be concerned about that? Then of course, other pieces of food want to join the first, and the toddler is more than happy to oblige. Again, I have no idea why that works, but I'm thankful it does on a regular basis.

What sort of bizarre circus acts do you perform to get your toddler to eat?