The best thing I've ever done for my kids

The best thing I've ever done for my kids is to get away from them a whole week.

My wife and I recently went on a week-long holiday—kid-free! Other than a weekend marriage encounter when we only had one child, this is the first time we've gotten away, just the two of us. Celebrating 15 years of marriage is a pretty good excuse to get away and recharge our parenting batteries.

Enjoying our Lighthouse Picnic in Ferryland, NL

We are truly blessed to have had the chance to focus on our marriage without the distractions of everyday life, without four fighting and screaming small people, without running to swimming lessons and soccer practices, without work, without grocery shopping, without mountains of laundry, without cooking and cleaning. It did our relationship a world of good.

We got to talk about something other than dirty diapers, homework struggles, frustrations at work, who didn't eat their peas—again, why someone had TV taken away—again, and all those other mundane things that consume parents. We even had the stamina to stay out past 10 pm. On more than one occasion!

It's no secret parenting is hard work and can be tiring. OK, exhausting at times. It's truly a 24/7 job, and it's one we do joyfully—in theory if not in practice all the time. So it makes sense that to do it well, to live one's vocation as spouse and parent, focusing on the marriage part is essential. And to be able to focus on that uninterrupted is a good thing. It's a great thing.

Jesus spoke about building on a solid foundation (cf Mat 7:24), and the solid foundation on which good parenting is built is marriage. We're refreshed and ready to help our little ones grow and reach their inherent God-given potential. We're ready to do it with renewed energy and enthusiasm. We're ready to  live our vocation and grow in holiness each and every day. We're ready for bed at 10 pm again.

What are some ways you focus on your marriage and recharge your parenting batteries?

Father's Day

To all you fathers and father figures out there. Have a great day! This is a day to celebrate and reflect how crucial fatherhood is. Every kid needs a father figure in their lives. May we be a clear reflection of our heavenly Father's boundless and unconditional love. 

St. Joseph, thanks for being such a wonderful example of fatherhood. Pray for us!

PS: This may be my shortest post ever because I wrote it on my phone. Will be back at a computer for the next post. 

Nurturing nature

I planted some saskatoon berry bushes in my recently cleared patch of dirt along the side of my house. If you have ever had saskatoons—in a pie, jam, as a sauce over pancakes or ice cream, or with fresh cream and honey like I used to have at my grandparent's—you will know how thrilled I am to have my own bushes. If you haven't had the pleasure of tasting saskatoons, I feel sorry for you.

It will be a few years before my little bushes are big enough to produce fruit, so I am taking the time to nurture them. The soil was prepared, I purchased good quality plants, the spot for them gets the right amount of light, they get watered and fertilized regularly, and I'll have to weed and till the soil occassionally. This routine will need to continue until the hearty bush is well established, ready to brave the elements of a prairie winter and potentially dry summer on its own.

It makes sense—it's almost intuitive—that we need to nurture plants. It takes a lot of time and not a little know-how, which doesn't necessarily come naturally.

Now read that last paragraph and substitute plants with marriage, children, relationship with God.

Does it seem as intuitive? I think it does. But more often than not I don't put the same effort into nurturing people and relationships that I do nurturing my precious bushes or garden. And still I expect them all to bear fruit.

Like plants, a marriage needs preparation, choosing the right person and feeding the relationship with time, sacrifice, service and prayer.

Like plants, children need their soil tilled from time-to-time, the weeds removed, they need to be fed and watered—not just in the physiological sense. In short, they need a lot of TLC if they are to grow and bear fruit as healthy and loving adults.

Like plants, our relationship with our creator needs to be nurtured if we are to bear fruit as His disciples. We need to be open to His love and nurturing and be fed through prayer, His word and especially the sacraments. How fitting I write this on the day we celebrate Corpus Christi, the feast of the body and blood of Christ.

Time, a little energy, and a healthy dose of grace are all it take to nurture and bear fruit.

My mouth is watering just thinking about eating a saskatoon berry pie.